What is the culture like?  
This is my interview question I ask internally when stepping into communities--athletic communities, spiritual communities, work communities, creative projects with artists--the cellular environment of a system.

"Will joining this certain community offer robustness enough to support growth--or just sufficient for a little just change?"
Will I actually create something here?

It's no surprise that when we find communities to help us ask these questions, we experience some massive shifts in how we create.
What if I fail?  What if I succeed?  What if I do nothing?

What if I fail?  Does the group support me in my goals?  Does the group know what my goals are--have I stated them thusly?  Am I supported when I don't make my goal?  Am I encouraged to get back up and try again?  

What if I succeed?  Believe it or not, many families/tribes view rising to the top as a form of dismantling the group.  Tribe energy is cohesive, unitive.  If you succeed, does this endanger the integrity of the group?  Does this tribe celebrate with you when you make your mark?

What if I do nothing?  Here's the trick:  for most of us, if we do nothing, nothing happens.  No punishment.  No reward.  Doing nothing is very easy--and easy to get away with.  Will your group tolerate you doing nothing [creative]?


Now, on to the creative act... Brené Brown speaks to stepping up to be seen and heard for your creative offerings--sometimes within critical communities.

I am para-quoting here, but I highly recommend the video:  Brene Brown on The Power of Being Vulnerable [and the whole series for that matter]


"When you start to be vulnerable and take chances you will be holding a very uncomfortable mirror up for some people.  And if you're surrounded by people who are critical, it's because daring greatly--to watch someone be vulnerable and risk, to


watch someone walk headlong into uncertainty--is so uncomfortable for people who are not willing to do that.  They are dying to see failure...and to point it out...
as confirmation that my way of living is okay.   "

I recently witnessed a lovely ceremony in which a colleague was asked to participate publicly, without notice.  Of course he agreed, and he stepped way up.  There is something so captivating in one's willingness to be put on the spot, to be vulnerable--open to inspiration, open to their heart--even open to the possibility of failure!  Witnessing someone play their edge before you is one of the most thrilling events in life!  I live for those moments in sports, in oration, in music performance when someone goes way out on a limb and works with It there.
_______

Brené:  It's so easy to make a life/career out in the bleachers.  People who are stepping into the arena, being seen, and showing up give feedback that is so much more constructive, useful and mindful.
Unless you are in some capacity getting your ass kicked on a regular basis, I don't have time for your criticism.
[applause, mine]
One of the greatest losses happening today is that there are people with amazing gifts, that can make a better place, but because of the fear-driven critics, we'll miss their gifts, their stories, their ideas, their music, their service....  
We'll never see/know it because there are reflexively cynical, critical, and mean-spirited individuals secretly rallying to see you fail--or hold you in the fold, well below your edge.  

_______

So is your community one that encourages you to jump?

"If you fly, then it looks like I'm not testing my edges, and living my fullest, most vulnerable, inspired life," say the critics.

So go ahead...Jump!

Feeling needed versus feeling loved.

We all need to feel Love.  We need to feel Love and feel loved.  Period.  

It's nice, however, to feel needed.  It's a great ego stroke when we feel missed.  It can be a wonderful, rudimentary esteem builder to feel appreciated by another.
Feeling needed requires approval and recognition.  It requires other.  

To say "I want to feel needed and appreciated,"  tacitly requests another to shower their approval and their recognition upon us.

Are you the best "Noticer" of yourself?  
Are you growing your ability to Track and to Witness Self?

Are you generous with your Witness toward yourself?

Start your holiday by breathing.  What else needs to be said?
I'm capping the practice at 16 people, so contact me or paypal [billing page] to RSVP.

Thursday November 22, 2012
8-10am
1821 W. Hubbard; free parking
door buzzer:  Tsubo 
$0-20.  

Cash or check is wonderful.  

See you then!

Curiosity reigns supreme!  Having parked in another business' lot, I decided to pop into their open-warehouse space to ask if it was alright to remain parked in their lot [Chicago has trained me well].  Inside the warehouse was a climbing facility and some laid-back employees having some couch/climb time; free weights lay in the center of the climb area.

Some friendly exchanges, a brief remark on what a great city Chicago is why I'm visiting Atlanta, and a handshake later....

The handshake.

This is the topic of discussion--albeit a short one, because really, couldn't we remark about expressing oneself  through the hands for days?  We shook hands and immediately triggered by the strength of his handshake grip, I remembered a question I had for climbers:

"Do you find value in the grip trainers?"

His recommendation [and a great one] was to  climb with tennis balls in your palms to limit the flexion to the ends of the fingers.
Brilliant self-limiting exercise!  

Keep grippers in the car.  I average approximately 10 lights per trip.  One squeeze per light seems like a very attainable goal.  The weirdness factor is low for passengers, and much quieter than my previous goal of practicing harmonica at each red light.

Take-aways and integration:   Shake your students' hands.  We are expressing ourselves constantly--through our voice, and so our breath, and through our hands.  
I use the handshake/name introduction to assess these in each student.   "How are you?  What's your name? [Handshake]"  It's a phenomenal thermostat for their quality of breath, resonance [openness/space] in the body, and strength--emotional strength and physical strength [hands are a continuation of the heart].

Carry on...with Strength!